My daughter is planning her own baby shower!?

Okay so she is not being traditional.She is inviting 80 people! She is buying decorations and controlling the invites, the hall, the food. She wants it to be men & women, fine. She does not get along with her father (divorced), so is not inviting anyone from that side! Not even her female cousins, even though they have silence since her high school years they are still family in my opinion. I asked who is on this list she became defensive. I have 2 female cousins in their 40's, and I doubt she will even remember them. She said it is mostly her boyfriends friends. She is not getting married, they plan on getting an apartment.It is frustrating for her to be doing this, I hung up on her when she started yelling at me. She is turning it into a social party for her bf's sake. Yet disrespecting family by omitting her dad's side entirely and the extensions of my family as well. She is also omitting her hometown friends because she has lived 3 towns away recently. These are mostly her older brothers friends that have all known her for over a decade, my son has a huge clan of good people. As far as the families-we are the ones who watched her grow. Not all her bf's people. I thought maybe she is doing this because she is not getting married and will not have that kind of huge celebration, but why insult your family. If she does not look beyond my mom, my 2 sisters, and myself and forgets my cousins and Aunt (my moms only sister) I will be very disappointed in her. My mother said, "okay fine it is just a party, no big deal, it doesn't matter in the long run." I feel if you shut out family they won't be around when the baby is born. And she is just being thoughtless and stubborn.